Am I too much to handle? Am I too sensitive? I was told many things over the years about who I am by people who had no clue about me or what I had been through. I was different, awkward, weird, or too sensitive for some (that last one was the worst). For others, I was awesome, kind, appreciated, intelligent, and beautiful inside and out.
I found people were aggressive when I was silent and quiet when I displayed emotions or said something that hit a little too close to home, and even when I was trying to show empathy.
I couldn’t understand why people weren’t as aware of their environment as I was or couldn’t see what I saw so clearly – moods, details, insights, complexities about everyday life.
For the longest time, I thought something was very wrong with me, and I learned to suppress my true self to fit what others wanted to see in an effort to survive. In talking with my therapist, I now understand that many people aren’t actually in touch with their emotions or even aware of why or even how they behave the way they do.
I have learned to accept that I’m actually stronger for being present with my emotions and analytical mind or, in other words, ‘too much to handle.’
The Feeling of Being ‘Too Much’
Have you been labeled ‘too intense,’ ‘too emotional,’ or ‘too sensitive?’ You might be relieved to know that it may not be you who has an issue. This label often stems from a society that misunderstands the essence of high sensitivity.
Misinterpretations can cause sensitive souls to believe their natural inclination towards deeper emotional intelligence, and understanding is a flaw. Consequently, this misjudgment fosters an internal struggle for self-acceptance.
Recognizing and accepting this sensitivity is not just an act of self-love but a cornerstone for personal growth. It paves the way for healthier, more genuine connections.
Embracing your inherent ‘too much’ is not an admission of weakness. The power of sensitivity can enrich both your life and that of others.
Understanding High Sensitivity
Emotional intelligence and the need for self-acceptance are at the heart of high sensitivity. Highly sensitive persons (HSPs) navigate life with a heightened awareness than most people. Deep emotional responses, analytical minds, and an unwavering sense of empathy are distinct qualities of HSPs. This trait, often called sensory processing sensitivity, is not uncommon, affecting about 15-20% of the population (Psychology Today).
Contrary to common misconceptions, these traits signify exceptional human insight and compassion. Imagine if most people had these traits. An environment that fosters the management and nurturing of emotions would be more common.
HSPs are more acutely aware of subtleties in their surroundings, such as changes in other’s moods. But with power comes setbacks. Those with this level of sensitivity become more easily overwhelmed by highly stimulating situations. This can include loud noises, strong smells, and intense emotions, both their own and those of others.
The Impact of Being Labeled ‘Too Much’
HSPs are likely to spiral into self-abandonment when they are labeled as ‘too much.’ They will suppress their genuine qualities in exchange for a semblance of acceptance.
This method of conformation takes a toll by causing a disconnection of the individual from their true self at the expense of personal growth and self-worth. Societal pressures compound the issue, unwelcoming the sensitivity, depth of emotion, and intensity.
Reflection on personal experiences becomes an essential tool for HSPs. Being ‘too much’ is not a flaw but a sign of profound emotional intelligence and capacity for deep connections. Embracing this truth can lead to healthier relationships and a supportive social circle. Accepting these traits is the first step in transforming perceived vulnerabilities into celebrated strengths.
Twelve Ways to Embrace Your Sensitivity
With the right strategies, challenges can seem manageable for HSPs. Below are twelve methods of empowerment:
- Speak Up: Finding your voice is crucial to articulating your needs and desires. By being more vocal about your thoughts and feelings, your emotional intelligence will shine, and you can foster environments where sensitivity is seen and valued. This is an act of self-care for HSPs (and anyone) that encourages healthier communication.
- Let Go of Unsupportive Relationships: It takes courage to distance yourself from connections that drain your energy rather than refill it. By prioritizing self-worth, HSPs make room for healing relationships that value deep processing and emotional responsiveness. Mutual respect becomes the foundation of new, supportive connections.
- Seeking Supportive Circles: Joining communities celebrating sensitivity can transform the HSP experience. Empowerment and self-care thrive in these spaces and provide the support to improve communications, establish boundaries, and encourage the HSP’s journey towards embracing their ‘muchness.’
- Self-care: Establishing personal boundaries protects our emotional well-being and helps us manage emotions effectively.
- Learn: Enhancing our emotional intelligence, communication, and self-awareness skills allows us to interpret and express our feelings in ways that resonate with our needs and those of others. Learn by reading books, articles, and research, attending workshops, journaling to gain clarity or reduce tension, and role-playing with a therapist or trusted friends for stressful situations or events.
- Structured Downtime: Plan periods of rest to recover from sensory overload.
- Mindfulness and Meditation: These practices can help HSPs manage their heightened emotional responses and find calm by grounding thoughts and emotions, especially during overwhelming situations.
- Creating a Comfortable Environment: Tailoring personal and work environments to minimize unpleasant sensory input can help. This might include using softer lighting, reducing background noise, or making ergonomic adjustments.
- Therapy: Therapists can help develop coping strategies tailored to their needs and challenges.
- Physical Activity: Helps to mitigate stress and improve mood. Activities like yoga, tai chi, or gentle walking can be particularly beneficial for HSPs, as they also incorporate elements of mindfulness.
- Selective Media Consumption: Avoid overly stimulating or emotionally distressing content.
- Artistic Expression: creative activities can be therapeutic and offer an outlet for expressing emotions and processing the world.
A Toast to Your ‘Too Much’
Embrace your intrinsic qualities and self-worth, and don’t dull your vibrancy. Being “too much” is a profound gift. It allows for deep connections, enriches your emotional intelligence, and enhances your ability to navigate the complexities of human relationships – a skill many of us can benefit from.
Self-care is critical to ensure you thrive in a world that misunderstands the depths of your feelings. Celebrate your capacity for intense love, thoughtful consideration, and much-needed empathy. These are the qualities that set you apart. Society doesn’t need another numb person. Your muchness is where your true power lies.
Have you been labeled as ‘Too much’?
Please drop us a comment below. You might be interested in our article on self-directed neuroplasticity to learn more about ways to stay grounded and change your view.
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